2024 in Review

Sort Of, I Guess, 2012, Louise Zhang.

I find year-end review lists, as well as “Ins and Outs” lists for the new year, deliciously fascinating — they’re usually much more cutthroat in their contents than other round-up lists that come out throughout the year and I like the sensation of completeness that they’re imbued with due to coming out at the end of a year. We all go through varying phases within a year, both in number and in type, but we all end it together, looking forward to the year that’s around the corner, always hopeful that it will hold more for us than what we are leaving behind. Time may often feel like a loose swirling social construct, but being able to neatly wrap a bow on the prior twelve months is satisfying for creatures such as we that like to compartmentalize.  

Year-end lists are generally filled with people’s cream of the crop experiences of the year, although now that I think about it, it would be hilarious to read something of the opposite sort, à la Epic Fails of the Year, if you will. Which reminds me that I should genuinely write those down more often in order to look back and laugh more frequently at my journal instead of rereading it and thinking “Jeez, not this same tortured topic AGAIN!” But I digress. 

2024 miraculously felt like a year where I stopped trying not to drown and learned I could float; not in a passive “I relinquish all free will and give myself up to the winds of fate” way, but in the sense that I feel like I could breathe a bit better than the two years prior. I finally started to gain back some confidence that I feared I had lost for good and can feel myself becoming more sure of who I am and what I like, which is also why I don’t really dislike getting older. I turned 25 this year, and while that doesn’t feel quite real, I don’t hate it. I did freak out about the concept of smile lines for one week when I was feeling particularly susceptible to the evil whims of the internet, but that subsided when I shook my head and realized the ridiculousness of that and also that smile lines and round cheeks are okay, cute even!, even when the internet trends say otherwise. 

This year kept bringing forth the Jenny Slate quote (from an old tweet of hers) “As the image of myself becomes sharper in my brain&more precious, I feel less  afraid that someone else will erase me by denying me love.” The image of myself becomes sharper as I get older and also as I gain new experiences, both positive and negative ones, and I think that reminiscing on my favorites of the year is a thoughtful exercise to reflect on what helped shape me this year. I do believe in art as a form of medicine, something that heals you in ways you may not even know needed healing, and as an alchemical force, transforming you in mysterious and nebulous ways that often aren’t realized until some time has passed. 

Alright, alright — here’s a smattering of things that I really enjoyed this year!

Movies

Another Round by Thomas Vinterberg. If I can’t get to a theatre showing, I patiently wait for movies I want to see to make their way to whatever streaming services I have and as a result did not get to this 2020 release until this year. I was immediately drawn in by the premise of the main characters undertaking a philosophical and social experiment and seeing just how far they could go. As I wrote in my review on Letterboxd, “They are the shot, the chaser, and the absurd final decision to drink and dance despite the destruction left in their path.”

Stop Making Sense by Jonathan Demme and David Bryne’s American Utopia by Spike Lee. As an all around Talking Heads and David Bryne fan, these two movies — a filmed concert and filmed broadway show, respectively — genuinely brought me to tears. These are so filled with the energy of life that they burst at the seams for me, they made me sing and dance in my seat and made me feel as if I had drunk the elixir of life. If I had to showcase the tenderness, creativeness, and hopefulness of human life to aliens, I would probably show American Utopia. 

Anatomy of a Fall by Justine Triet. I love a psychological thriller and a movie with an ending that’s open to interpretation. The dialogue in this movie was also breathtaking, not for its beauty but for the punches it packed, I mean, come on - “Your generosity conceals something dirtier and meaner. You’re incapable of facing your ambitions and you resent me for it.” PHEWWWWW! I also really recommend starting your days with the theme song, a steel drum rendition of P.I.M.P. by 50 cent if you want to feel like a bad (bald) bitch.

Singin in the Rain by Gene Kelly and Stanley Donen. What else is there left to say about this classic? It is sumptuous, glorious, and beyond perfection; I am obsessed. 

The Big Lebowski by the Coen Brothers. God I love the Coen Brothers. I also think that throwing a party where everyone can only dress up as a character from this movie would be incredible; no one steal that idea, or if you want to collaborate and fund this grand idea of mine, please do contact me.

Books

Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. This was somehow the only book that I rated as 5 stars on my Goodreads this year, but I realize that’s because I’m becoming increasingly picky about what I rate 5 stars. I never would’ve guessed that this much discussed and contentious book would become my favorite for the year, but Vladimir Nabokov operates on a different level than the rest of us. In a dream world, I would’ve read this with access to an English professor and weekly discussions, but I look forward to rereading it in the future and picking up on even more wild and cunning craftsmanship. 

Things I Don't Want to Know by Deborah Levy. Maybe to a concerning degree I am interested in people’s routines, especially those of artists, and of course those of writers. These essays were a peak into Levy’s life as a writer, woman, and immigrant and left a pleasing chill down my spine because of how she articulates her thoughts and ideas. 

Ex-Wife by Ursula Parrot, Introduction by Alissa Bennet. Long story short, I found Alissa Bennet through her podcast with Lena Dunham called The C-Word, about dismissed “bad” women in history, I requested to follow her on Instagram, she posted something about Edith Wharton within maybe a day, and I knew that I had found a kindred soul. When she posted that she would be writing the introduction for a reprint of a scandalous divorcée book from the 1920’s, I made a point whilst in NYC in March to stop by McNally Jackson and buy one of the beautiful new books. I would delightfully share a highball with the ladies of this book, preferably whilst in the latest glamorous fashions.

Almond by Sohn Won-Pyung. Thank you to my lovely Aeja for gifting me this book. It was the book I read through the fastest this year and possibly the only one to make me cry. It is beautiful, heartbreaking, and I highly recommend going in blind. 

Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain. I purposefully listened to this on audiobook to hear Bourdain's voice and what a treat it was to do that. He has such a potty-mouth even in writing and I love how even if it wasn’t him reading it, I would know it was written by him, a trait that I highly admire and covet. He has such a way of describing the characters he meets and the foods he prepares and eats you can’t help but be jealous of his almost religious devotion to his senses. 

Food

Lanna Curry/Khao Soi. (Northern Thailand Curry) A beauty and a curse of traveling is realizing that food you fall in love with will probably not be found when you go home, which is why I went rabid for this coconut-based curry while in Thailand. I love green, red, and massaman curry—all things I’ve had in America—but I’d never heard of this until this month and now I fear I need to either buckle down in the kitchen and give a honest attempt at making this or forever live with its rich and spicy goodness lingering in my mind. 

Heirloom Tomatoes. I had never had them before despite being such a tomato lover that I do indeed eat them like apples, just add some olive oil and salt on every bite and voila. 

Fugazetta (Argentinean Cheese Pizza). Lactose intolerance be damned, I am going to be eating dairy. This is like dairy raised to the power of 3 and also has onions, so really just forget comfort in your stomach for a bit after eating this, but my good god. 

Songs

Glass, Concrete, Stone performed Live by David Byrne in American Utopia Again, this is from the Broadway show, but this song in particular makes me tear up from tenderness and silliness every time I play it. “Everything’s possible, when you’re an animal”, yes…YES!!!

Crosseyed and Painless performed live by Talking Heads. The rising, falling, rushing, slowing, expanding, shrinking, exploding sensation that this gives me is like no other. I cannot imagine being in the crowd when this was filmed.

Masquerade by Stereophonic Broadway Cast. I love anything that sounds like 1970’s rock/folk and this Broadway show follows a music group during a tumultuous year of creation. There are many gems on this soundtrack, but this might be my favorite due to its hypnotic pace that diverges and transforms into something psychedelic before eventually returning to a more sonically full and propulsive rock ending. 

Uncle ACE by Blood Orange. I obviously loved Challengers (2024) and have loved Blood Orange for years, but this song was taken to the next level for me because of the movie. It feels like a strong Paloma in a lush, amber-hued bar mixed with sexual tension that’s risky, eventually given into, and discovered to be addictive so you sneak out the back together. I’ll take another, please.

I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For by U2. When I realized this song was by U2 I laughed because remember when they randomly download their entire album on everyone’s iPhones years ago? I had a grudge against them for that. Well now I’ll forgive them, at least a bit. I find the lyrics really beautiful and my desired place to play this would be driving in the American West, somewhere like a desert while the sun is about to set, the sky is a bit pink and blue before it goes dark, the air is getting colder, windows down, head out the window, soaking it all in, everything. 

This year I became closer to my friends and family, learned how long I could live off pretzels while grieving the loss of my grandma, took my first two girl’s trips (NYC and DC), went to a petting zoo and cried while holding a bunny, saw many beautiful artworks, went to my first film festival screening, traveled to Argentina, Vietnam, and Thailand, ate a silkworm, laughed over many frozen yogurts and wine, and published on here more than I had even set out. 

This year was full of activities and taught me that I really should be saying yes to (almost) everything offered my way and also making my own luck. Putting yourself out there, doing the scary thing, not just floating along — these all take effort, but they are far superior to a life left unlived.